Becoming: The Sacred Journey Back to Who You Were Always Meant to Be
Part 6: “Messy & Becoming – Why Love Is a Process, Not Perfection”
Key Verses: Romans 5:8; Philippians 1:6 (AMPC)
“He who began a good work in you will continue to perfect and complete it…”
Introduction: The Beauty of the Middle
There was a season I thought love had to look spotless, like my white coat.
No stains. No shadows. No evidence of the mess.
But God began to show me that real love looks more like clay, holy hands working in the chaos, shaping something sacred through imperfection.
And maybe that’s the point:
Love isn’t clean.
It’s creative.
It sanctifies through struggle.
1. The Myth of the Perfect Love Story
We’ve been discipled by fairy tales, even in the church.
We imagine love as arrival, not apprenticeship.
We think holiness means harmony, not honesty.
But the Gospel was never about flawless connection.
It was about a love that stayed through the process.
Romans 5:8 doesn’t say Christ died when we were perfect.
It says He died while we were still sinners.
Love met us mid-process.
That’s the divine pattern: grace enters before we get it right.
“Perfection was never the point. Presence is.”
2. The Sacred Work of Loving in the Middle
We don’t just meet God at the finish line.
We meet Him in the middle, in the ordinary sanctification of our chaos.
In the argument where you choose to pause instead of explode.
In the apology that costs your pride.
In the patience that feels like dying.
That’s love in process, not a performance, but participation in divine formation.
It’s strange how holiness hides inside heartbreak, how our most human moments become heaven’s classrooms.
And this is where many lose heart: we want resurrection without crucifixion, connection without correction, and intimacy without vulnerability.
But real love sanctifies. It doesn’t flatter our comfort, it matures our character.
3. Jung, the Holy Spirit, and the Alchemy of Becoming
Carl Jung called this lifelong unfolding individuation, the sacred integration of the fragmented self. Scripture calls it sanctification, the Spirit’s patient shaping of our souls.
Different languages, same revelation: God does not demand perfection, He invites wholeness.
And wholeness is messy. It’s where shadow and spirit meet.
Where you don’t run from what’s broken, you redeem it through awareness, repentance, and grace. This is the holy alchemy of love: to see the flaw and still choose formation.
“God doesn’t wait for your polish, He meets you in your process.”
4. Why God Doesn’t Wait for Your Perfection
God doesn’t love the future version of you.
He loves the becoming you: trembling, learning, unlearning, growing.
He doesn’t wait for the polish; He begins in the raw material.
Because every artist knows, the masterpiece starts in chaos.
You are not behind.
You are becoming.
Progress is proof of purpose.
And heaven celebrates the one who keeps showing up, even when it’s still messy.
5. Affirmations for the Process
✦ My mess is not my disqualification, it’s my meeting place with grace.
✦ I am allowed to be unfinished and still be beloved.
✦ Love is not the absence of struggle, it’s the presence of sanctification.
✦ God is not disappointed in my becoming, He delights in my progress.
✦ Every layer I shed is a return to the image of God within me.
Let these words sit in your spirit. Say them slowly. Let them become new architecture for your identity.
6. The Holy Pause
Love does not rush your redemption.
Heaven is not in a hurry.
Becoming takes time and that time is sacred.
You are not failing because it’s taking long.
You are forming.
When the noise fades, when you no longer need to prove, perform, or perfect, that’s when you finally begin to become.
7. The Invitation: Keep Loving in the Middle
Maybe the miracle isn’t that you’ll arrive perfectly healed, but that you’ll keep showing up as you heal. Maybe heaven’s applause isn’t for the finished, but for the faithful.
So keep becoming.
Keep loving in the middle.
Keep letting the Spirit make beauty out of your process.
Because you are not evidence of imperfection.
You are evidence of grace in motion.
Reflection Prompt
Where is God asking you to love in the middle, not just at the end?
Pause.
Write it down.
Pray into it.
Let your process become your praise.
Closing Benediction
May you remember:
You are not behind.
You are becoming.
And that becoming is the holiest thing about you.
Wholeness is worship. Becoming is sacred.
— Dr. Onaola Adedeji, MD
